Are You Helping To Develop Your Child’s Independence?

Do you realise that doing too much for your children can have an impact on them developing self-reliance, independence and confidence in their abilities?

Overparenting’ as it is termed, suggests to a child that they are not able to handle life’s issues on their own. ‘When parents jump in, remove obstacles, orchestrate play and direct the future, they extinguish a child’s ability to think and act’1 at this site for themselves.

There may be some short-term advantage in parents over-helping with homework, but in the long term, it undermines a child’s ability to manage their world and their responsibilities.

Here are a few ideas to allow your children to develop independence. Let them: –

  1. Do jobs around the house, even if you can do them better and faster. Don’t feel guilty, as children are very capable.

  2. Pack and unpack their school bags and lunchboxes.

  3. Be responsible for finishing their homework thoroughly and showing you the results.

  4. Do their own projects. If they don’t understand, let the teacher know.

  5. Experience the consequences if jobs/homework/assignments are not finished.

  6. Develop their interests, attitudes and relationships naturally. Encourage these without interfering.


Be the parent who ‘blends emotional warmth with firm boundaries’. Be the leader. Be involved, but let them make mistakes.

‘Be strict, but treat children like intelligent beings who deserve explanations, rather than orders’.